Nothing's Perfect
by TheDoublemintTwins11
Summary: They had a plan... It was going to be the biggest heist of all time! They knew exactly what they were going for: the promised land...Yes, the fridge! Oneshot, no pairings.


**Nothing's Perfect**

**-DM Twins-**

Never had one seen a more perfect day than this. Not only was the weather fair—blue skies and calm waters as far as the eye could see—but the _plan!_ Yes, the plan was probably the most perfect of it all.

It started with a simple "distract Sanji". That was the easy part. A tip to the blonde from an anonymous source that there was an entire keg of beer stolen and stashed in the weight room was more than enough. The keg had been planted, mind you, but that was part of the plan's genius.

How, you may ask, on this perfect day with this perfect plan, could anything go wrong? Well, that's simple. Miscalculation. Two things hadn't been taken into account. First, was that when you opened Sanji's walk in refrigerator, it swung closed on its own accord. And second, was that said door would lock if given the opportunity.

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* * *

"Luffy," Usopp mumbled, "Did you plant the keg like I asked?"

Luffy nodded. His mouth was pressed into a thin line. Normally, hewould be joking and laughing, but no. This was serious business. Usopp returned the nod and ascended the stairs that would bring him to the galley. The second he entered, with Luffy close behind, he was met by Chopper's expectant look. Usopp gave him the thumbs up and shot him a conspiratorial smile.

"That was a big keg." Chopper said, almost shouted, into the elevator. Several days ago, Usopp had discovered that everything said near the elevator could be heard in the kitchen, and visa versa.

"That's not fair," Luffy whined, also facing the elevator, "Why does Zoro get his own _personal_ keg for the weight room. Sanji won't even give me a mid-day snack…" A clatter of dishes from the kitchen echoed down the shaft. Success! The door leading out of the kitchen slammed and footsteps trailed across the upper-deck.

With no time to spare, the three slid into the elevator and began their ascent.

"This is working perfectly!" Chopper said. Usopp quickly hushed him as the doors rattled open. And there it was. Sitting across the room, mocking them with its icy, food-filled glory, was the freezer. So close!

Of course, there was one final obstacle they had to overcome before they reached the promise land, and that was the lock.

"Stand aside. This is man's work." Usopp said in a voice that screamed "brave warrior of the sea." He had carefully and skillfully watched as Sanji dialed the combination. He'd seen it countless times—checked and re-checked—just to be sure. Usopp dialed the combo and the door opened with a sigh. He puffed out his chest triumphantly while Luffy and Chopper clapped silently.

The three entered the walk-in freezer happily, because, after all, they were pioneers. Never before had anyone but Sanji stepped foot in his domain. They immediately targeted the best of the food, because they knew… _knew!_ That they were in the clear. And just as this crossed their minds the unthinkable happened: the door sighed shut. And when it closed, they heard the worst possible sound. The click of a lock.

To say that an uproar of blind panic closely followed was an understatement. The three flew to the door and latched onto the handle, but even with their combined effort they knew that the lock wasn't going to give. It had been Luffy-proofed, after all.

"Usopp! What are we going to do! We're locked in!" Chopped squealed. "We're going to get caught!" Usopp put a hand on his chin thoughtfully, trying to hide his own quickening heartbeat.

"Think of something! Quick!" Luffy added. He tapped Usopp's forehead for good measure, in a last ditch attempt to knock a plan into his nakama's mind. Usopp's eyes popped open.

"Ok here's what we're going to do!" The two leaned closer so they could hear his whisper. "I say we all grab the food and bolt the second the door is opening. We'll use the element of surprise. At this point, it's our only chance!" The three were so enthralled that none of them noticed the flower petals that slowly drifted to the ground.

* * *

"Oh Cook-san." Cooed Robin as she walked past Sanji, who was busy arguing with Zoro. He instantly tore away from the fight, disregarding the swordsman completely. She chuckled.

"You may want to take a look at your fridge. It's making some rather odd noises." Without another word she walked off to the library to do some reading.

* * *

Like I said before. It was a perfect day, and a perfect plan. We made no mistakes… That is, until that one fatal flaw. But by then, it was too late. Betrayed by our own nakama, the element of surprise did us no good. We learned the hard way that nothing and I mean _nothing_ is perfect.

**And there you have it. Our oneshot, written quite a while ago, we finally got around to typing it up. I hope you liked it!**


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